The Nightwish concert draws nearer... I have had the ticket for months, yesterday I collected the train tickets to minimise the nasty surprises, I have a place to stay the night...
and I also have a 37,2 fever. Well, fuck me sideways. At least I have four days to get over this. Which hopefully will be enough. Does it make any considerable difference whether or not I take Aspirin?
A note: DO NOT PRESS "ESC" BUTTON WHILE WRITING UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!
I did. As I was saying... I'll be off to my mother's place for four looooong days (I may die of boredom).
So, because I am so very lazy I'll wish you all merry Yule here. Let me know how many of the languages did you recognise WITHOUT using Google.
Hyvää joulua ja parempaa uutta vuotta!
God Jul och Bättre Nytt År!
Merry Yule and a Better New Year!
Buon Natale e felice anno nuovo!
Gleðileg jól og farsælt nýtt ár!
Häid Jõule ja Head Uut Aastat!
¡Feliz Navidad y próspero año nuevo!
Frohe Weihnachten und ein gutes neues Jahr!
A Blithe Yule an a Guid New Year!
Geseënde Kersfees en 'n voorspoedige Nuwe jaar!
Joyeux Noël et bonne année!
Prettige kerstdagen en een Gelukkig NieuwJaar!
Nadolig llawen a blwyddyn newydd dda !
yItIv QISmaS 'ej Quch chu' wa'maH 'ej cha' maSmey!
Ya'at'eeh Keshmish!
Natale hilare et annum faustum!
I am right now acting like a stereotypical gay man: I'm listening to Epica cover of 'Memory' from the musical 'Cats' for the Xth time today.
Pop quiz: did you know the above-mentioned musical is based on T.S. Eliot's play called 'Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats'? If you didn't, congratulations: now you do.
Tomorrow, my dear fellows under the rainbow, I will be a manipulative bitch and pretend to be a straight woman. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not doing this because I wish to hide my true colours. My intention is to keep one important piece of information from my mother. It's her doctor I need to talk to tomorrow in order to be allowed to continue on the pills and since the ..hmm.. straight assumption is that I need them not to get knocked up by my alleged boyfriend... well, I'll just go along and not correct the doctor, just in case she does not view our phone conversation as part of her professional confidentiality. So lest she tells the details of the conversation to my mother (I phoned there earlier today and later to my mother who told me a nurse had told her of the phone call, so I'm not too convinced of confidence of any discussion in there), my mother will assume I'm straight and having sex with "my boyfriend" (she's probably not going to ask me about it directly, so I don't have to keep on pretending... not that I would even if she did ask) instead of knowing why I really need the pills.
That is my business, and my business alone. My mother has betrayed my trust so many times I tell her nothing significant. My advice to you, from a child's point of view: don't lie to them even when it's something you don't find in any way important. It may not be important but children have the tendency of remembering the oddest things. And they don't forget you lied to them; then they'll know you can do it again, and whether that something is important or not makes no difference at all.
Oh, and happy Lucia's Day!
Is it this bloody Yule creeping behind the corner or have people just gone insane?
Last week at Anttila the entire building was filled with people doing their shoppings. As I was standing in a relatively 'for-one-person'-sized alley between the shelves and pondering whether or not to get a DVD X, some guy came from behind and poked my back with his finger! Not only did it feel very nasty in and of itself, but by the time I realised it was a man breaking my physical immunity I was ready to push him back and remind him with somewhat restrained voice to *ask* people to move instead of touching them. Alas, there was a guard standing nearby so I had to swallow my anger and instead stare the guy for a very long time with a very icy stare and move my back as if shaking off something very much unwanted. I think he got the message, even though I would have preferred an actual verbal discipline lesson in front of the entire department.
Today, as I was paying my groceries, again some yahoo decided to ignore my right to physical immunity and poked my hips from both sides at the same time. The only reason the person got away with it with yet another icy stare was that it was a she. Had it been male, I would have started shouting right there.
What is it that people don't respect everyone's right not to be touched, especially by strangers? Do they ignore it with everyone? Had the people done it if I were a man? No, they wouldn't have.
Fuck them! Fuck this world! Fuck this year! FUCK!
I cannot believe I have been going to the gym for over two years but never had I tried out BodyBalance until tonight. What a mistake! What an excellent way to spend an hour!
Seriously, for a person like me living in conscious celibacy there could be nothing better than BodyBalance. By the end of the class my body is thoroughly relaxed as in after a specially good orgasm and the whole world seems to be smiling at me. And this feeling c o m p l e t e l y without the aspect of sex!
YAY! I am so going there again!
I FEEL GREAT!
Yesterday there was a story about the Finnish childbearing habits and its effects on television in "45 minuuttia". I couldn't help my feelings flare up while watching it. It was probably intentionally made provocative but still...
The main thing that really bothered me was the attitude that women are socially allowed to do whatever they want with their life to certain age. The whole thing seemed to be "The Handmaid's Tale" veiled with women's freedom. As if it is our duty as women to have children and thus increase the number of children being born (and the number of future tax payers, obviously). This of course further reinforces the patriarchal norms and, more importantly, the way the heteronormative society views women and their position in the contemporary society.
It seems that there are several things the authorities have, conveniently enough, ignored when it comes to the financial level of having children. First, the child allowance has remained the same for ages. Even though the allowance does increase with the number of children (with about ten euros more to have two children instead of one), it does NOT make difference with the children's age. Imagine having twins. You cannot reuse clothing, shoes, school and hobby accessories and such since there needs to be two of them at the same time. Obviously, this is more expensive than the allowance suggests.
Second, staying home as a home mom is not possible for a single woman. The allowance to get for that (or for cutting down working hours, too) is lower than the one an unemployed person gets daily. In all, the financial support the society gives to parent/parents has not been updated to equal with today's price level. If one happens to have a lot money BEFORE having children, it helps. Otherwise, one is doomed to be labelled statistically as 'poor'.
Let's think this in a personal level next. Let's assume I wanted to give my share to the society's expectation right now. What is my current status? I do not have a significant other, so the entire responsibility to support the household (that is, me and the child/children [fertility treatments increase the possibility of multiple pregnancies, hence the plural option]) would rest on my shoulders. I'm a student without a degree so I would get allowances as seen below. The thing that really bothers is that being a single mom without a degree I would not be getting a job very easily afterwards anywhere. The amount of the allowance is determined by one's income. Being a student I get the minimum allowance. If I waited until I had a job the allowance would be higher. So is it really a surprise people want to study and get that bloody job before having children?!
Mother allowance: 50-30 days before the expected date for 105 days, with my income = 15,20 €/day
Parent allowance: 158 days right after the mother allowance, with my income = 15,20 €/day
Child allowance: from the beginning of the month following the birth month, one child = 100 €
Total financial support per month =
8th pregnancy month: appr. 228 €
9th pregnancy month: appr. 395 €
1st month with the child: appr. 495 €
2nd month with the child: appr. 328 €
3rd -> month with the child: 100 €
And all this without any other support from anyone else. And added to the fact that I would have to use fertility treatments (ironically enough, I would have to do that whether I was a lesbian or a straight woman...) the cost of which hover around two thousand per each try, which in my case might be several. Not exactly encouraging to go through.
"45 minuuttia" titled the story with the word 'selfishness' in it. But is it really selfish not to have children to a world where the daughter can be raped and then blamed for it? Is it selfish not to have a child in a world where there is no justice, no equality, and where the tower of illusion of freedom comes tumbling down every fucking day? Is it really selfish not to force them to go through this when we, our own generation, deliberately makes things even worse? A Timo Rautianen & Trio Niskalaukaus song says that this world is not to be left to the children, but that WE have borrowed the world from the children.
I don't think the children are quite pleased of the condition the world is returned.
General provisions:
A – Whereas the saying "all is fair in love and war" is absolutely correct;
B – Whereas for war we have the Geneva Convention, approved on 22 August 1864, which provides for those wounded in the battle field, but until now no convention has been signed concerning those wounded in love, who are far greater in number;
It is hereby decreed that:
Article 1 – All lovers, of any sex, are alerted that love, besides being a blessing, is also something extremely dangerous, unpredictable and capable of causing serious damage. Consequently, anyone planning to love should be aware that they are exposing their body and soul to various types of wounds, and that they shall not be able to blame their partner at any moment, since the risk is the same for both.
Article 2 – Once struck by a stray arrow fired from Cupid's bow, they should immediately ask the archer to shoot the same arrow in the opposite direction, so as not to be afflicted by the wound known as "unrequited love". Should Cupid refuse to perform such a gesture, the Convention now being promulgated demands that the wounded partner remove the arrow from his/her heart and throw it in the garbage. In order to guarantee this, those concerned should avoid telephone calls, messages over the Internet, sending flowers that are always returned, or each and every means of seduction, since these may yield results in the short run but always end up wrong after a while. The Convention decrees that the wounded person should immediately seek the company of other people and try to control the obsessive thought: "this person is worth fighting for".
Article 3 – If the wound is caused by third parties, in other words if the loved one has become interested in someone not in the script previously drafted, vengeance is expressly forbidden. In this case, it is allowed to use tears until the eyes dry up, to punch walls or pillows, to insult the ex-partner in conversations with friends, to allege his/her complete lack of taste, but without offending their honor. The Convention determines that the rule contained in Article 2 be applied: seek the company of other persons, preferably in places different from those frequented by the other party.
Article 4 – In the case of light wounds, herein classified as small treacheries, fulminating passions that are short-lived, passing sexual disinterest, the medicine called Pardon should be applied generously and quickly. Once this medicine has been applied, one should never reconsider one's decision, not even once, and the theme must be completely forgotten and never used as an argument in a fight or in a moment of hatred.
Article 5 – In all definitive wounds, also known as "breaking up", the only medicine capable of having an effect is called Time. It is no use seeking consolation from fortune-tellers (who always say that the lost lover will return), romantic books (which always have a happy ending), soap-operas on the television or other such things. One should suffer intensely, completely avoiding drugs, tranquilizers and praying to saints. Alcohol is only tolerated if kept to a maximum of two glasses of wine a day.
Final determination: Those wounded in love, unlike those wounded in armed conflict, are neither victims nor torturers. They chose something that is part of life, and so they have to accept both the agony and the ecstasy of their choice.
And those who have never been wounded in love will never be able to say: "I have lived". Because they haven't.
(Copyright @ 2007 by Paulo Coelho)
Since everyone else is doing it... well, not really.
{x} Sigourney Weaver
{ } Isabella Rossellini
Sigourney rocks... and I have no idea who the other is.
{ } Kata Kärkkäinen
{x} Laura Malmivaara
I don't know why... Kärkkäinen just seems so... whorish.
{ } Eva Longoria
{x} Angelina Jolie
Seriously? Did someone actually have to consider?
{ } Anneli Saaristo
{x} Ulla Tapaninen
So much for hapy thoughts after Angelina... ouch! Fine... I'm under the impression that Mrs. Tapaninen is verbally very talented which is a turn-on as far as I'm concerned.
{x} Uma Thurman
{ } Nicole Kidman
The Bride...! One of the few blondes I found attractive.
{ } Leena Harkimo
{ } Kirsi Piha
I am exercising the right not to wal... not to have sex. Hail celibacy!
{ } Jessica Simpson
{x} Christina Aquilera
Shit... fine. I'm not turned on, not in the least.
{ } Maria Guzenina
{ } Tanja Saarela
Chrissakes...! Hail celibacy, again!
{ } Victoria Beckham
{x} Niina Herala
{ } Pirre (Eija Vilpas)
{x} Hansu (Riitta Havukainen)
It's the brunette factor.
{x} Lena Olin
{ } Geena Davis
Ooo...
{ } Erja Häkkinen
{x} Outi Mäenpää
{x} Irina Björklund
{ } Miia Nuutila
{ } Julia Roberts
{x} Sarah Jessica Parker
{ } Kiira Korpi
{x} Eva Wahlström
Strong women are so sexy...
{x} Hillary Clinton
{ } Päivi Lipponen
What do you think, how difficult would it be to get to work in the White House?
{ } Susanna Sievinen
{ } Susan Kuronen
To quote millikan, "no voi Jumalan pyssyt ja puukuulat, mitä vaihtoehtoja..." For the third time, hail celibacy! And isn't the bitch (princess) Ruusunen nowadays?
{ } Lisa Marie Presley
{x} Céline Dion
It's the French aspect... there's something so sensual about the French women.
{x} Kaija Koo
{ } Anna Hanski
Brunette vs. blonde.
{ } Arja Alho
{x} Angela Merkel
Intellectual appeal.
{ } Aira Samulin
{x} Tarja Halonen
This was easy.
{x} Demi Moore
{ } Jennifer Aniston
{ } Kristiina Halkola
{ } Katri-Helena
Who is Kristiina Halkola? Her, if she's brunette or redhead, otherwise I'll pass.
{x} Naomi Cambell
{ } Claudia Schiffer
Have you heard that most straight women fantasise about having sex with a black man? I'm not an exception, I just switch the male aspect to something far more sexy.
{x} Sofi Oksanen
{ } Leena Lehtolainen
An LGBT writer beats a straight writer anyday.
{x} Salma Hayek
{ } Pamela Anderson
This was SO easy! I have a tricky one: Salma Hayek or Angelina Jolie? I want them both!!!
{x} Madonna
{ } Melanie Griffith
Seriously?
{x} Sandra Bullock
{ } Gwyneth Paltrow
{ } Agnetha Fältskog
{ } Anni-Frid "Frida" Lyngstad
How about Frida Kahlo? Please?? Pretty please???
{x} Halle Berry
{ } Penélope Cruz
Duh!
Kinda self-explanatory title... In a couple of hour I'm officially and undeniably twenty-two years old. Yeeha.
And since I have absolutely no one to give me a hug today, I guess the smiley will have to do.
