To do or not to do, that is the question.

Rain

8.7.2007 22:35

There are other reasons to go to a gynecologist aside from pap-smears. You know that... The overall health of your reproductive organs, vagina, and even your overall health, can be examined. Your irregular periods are also something you can't really ignore.

As for the whole experience, well, one can amuse oneself by looking at the doctor, who now has a beard or a landing strip, or at least a mons as a chin. What else does one do anyway?

Splenetic

11.7.2007 12:14

Yes, I know... Although amusing myself by evaluating the appearance of the doctor the way you described is out of the question. If I do manage to get a grip of myself there is NO way I go see a *male* gynaecologist. No man will ever come anywhere near my pussy as long as I live!

Well, I'll think about this. I have about a month before the student health care opens up again after the summer break. Then I'll go see the GP and ask her opinion on this (and make sure that if I actually get an appointment to a gynaecologist she will definitely be a she!).

Rain

11.7.2007 15:06

I don't go to male gynecologists, though I have had to a couple of times out of lack of choice. The first man was pleasant, one could see he cared and nothing he did hurt, the other one was less pleasant and he hurt me by not warning me so I could relax my muscles, but at least it was over quickly.

But, my Doctor for the past many years, is a woman, and well, she's quite hot, so my main concern is not giving it away too much. Heh...

My problems are quite complex though, so I do not have the option of not going to a doctor. However, now that I have a regular Gynecologist, things are much better, as I am used to her, and at ease with her, and she is truly dedicated to what she does. I also simply like her...

Once you get used to a specific doctor, much of the uncomfortableness goes away, also, once you have been through one examination, the next one won't be so foreign. Doctors listen, if they are good. There are smaller instruments, alternative instruments, and they even have alternatives available, if they truly are dedicated to their work, and care...

Splenetic

13.7.2007 02:28

That's one of my concerns, that once I show up at the doctor's the female gynaecologist I was supposed to see has got a fever or something and instead I have no choice but to go to a male gynaecologist. Over... my... dead... body!

I've been reading about the examination and its course on some medical books I found from the library (what a nice way to provoke hypochondria, reading medical books in the evening). I was very much taken aback by the possibility of having to go through a breast and rectum examinations as well.

I just hate the idea of having to go there. How am I supposed to be able to relax when a stranger I met approximately ten minutes before is viewing my genitalia with a bright light and sticking things inside me?

Rain

15.7.2007 04:23

I am sorry, I really should not be laughing right now, but I can't help it. You certainly have quite the turn of phrase, don't you?

I have never had an OBGYN give me a rectal exam, the only time I ever had anything like that, was when i caught a lovely case of amoebic dysentery, and lo-and-behold, the only time I was not shitting out of control, was when I was required to give a sample, so the doctor who wished to have the sample, went in and got one. I highly doubt an OBGYN will be giving you any rectal exams.

As for breast exams, I have once had a doctor give me one, but he was very impersonal about it and it was part of a physical, and I did not really give a damn. Perhaps I am too able to simply ignore things, but also, I am quite scary so I think most of the time men shit themselves around me, and would not dare cross me. Funny though, I look quite mild mannered, but, I digress...

You know, some doctors are interested in meeting their patients before having to examine them. As you are female, you will need to go to OBGYNs yearly or every couple of years at the very least, for most of your life, so it does not hurt to find one you like, and get to know her. Firsts times are always awkward, even it is a dentist. Someone sticking fingers into any orifice is always personal...

I had surgery a few years ago, on my uterus, (which is now going to be removed in August, as the surgery only delayed the problem) and I had it done at a teaching hospital. That was where my doctor did her surgeries, so of course, that is where I went. I would go to China, if that was where she was practising. But anyway...

I had spinal anesthesia, and I was drugged, but awake during the procedure, and during some course of the situation, I looked around, and noticed that my doctor was giving a lecture to an assembled group of students, none of whom looked old enough to shave, either face or legs, and who were standing at a respectful distance from the good doctor, but still close enough to see what was going on, with their notebooks, and their little surgical gowns on. (it being a sterile room and everything) It was then that I realised that a dozen people who were not my nurses or my doctor or anything who had any business to be there, were well, in class, and I was the blackboard. So, not only did I have the equivalent of the ISS stuffed up me, and the insides of me were on a TV Screen for me to watch in drugged amazement, but well, 12 little kids, were taking notes. After she was done, she wanted to examine me with the ultrasound wand, but as my vaginal canal was sterile, she could not, so I heard her announce in a loud voice that she was going to insert it rectally, and then the frantic scribbling of notes by the assembled students. I believe I started to laugh at this point, which probably confirmed that I am slightly insane.

Trust me, a speculum is all the doctor will use, and then a big q-tip for the pap smear, and she will simply examine you with her eyes, her fingers, and palpitate your abdomen. She will want to do an ultrasound, which usually involves an instrument the shame of a vibrator which is inserted into the vagina, lubricated of course. If you are a physical virgin, it might be uncomfortable, but she will know from having examined you if you are or not and external ultrasound is an alternative option, which involves conductive jelly on your belly, and running something that looks like a small hairdryer across your abdomen. Then she will ask you about your history, your problems, and then tell you what needs to happen next. She is not going to be doing 'what happens next' on the first visit. She has to get to know you, and what is going on, before anything more complicated happens...

TMI?

LOL, sorry, still laughing...

Splenetic

16.7.2007 18:25

First I'd like to offer my consolences for the hysterectomia, especially if it now prevents you from having a child (if that is what you were hoping to have some day, of course).

Laughing? Let me guess. "Taken aback"? Pun very much unintended, but it's nice to know I can make someone smile.

As for the rectum and brest examinations... I've read three different medical books so far and each and every one of them include them as a routine part of a gynaecological examination. So that's why I'm worried even more than for the "normal" vaginal examination.

I have no idea how I'm supposed to find a gynaecologist I like. I guess I can't exactly go from one obgyn to another testing whose presence I find the least uncomfortable. But then again, I'm not sure it really even matters that much; it's someone I don't personally know so it's bound to be painstakingly awkward and relentlessly causing me severe anxiety attacks starting from the first time. Then there is of course the gay issue to deal with. Anyway, I have to be sent to the gynaecologist by my student health care doctor so I don't even get to choose, unless I somehow manage to pay for a private sector gynaecologist (then I could have more to say about who is treating me).

But why the hell should I go there every year?

Rain

16.7.2007 21:05

Funny that, I have never had an OBGYN either in the USA, Australia, or Finland even do a rectal exam. One did a breast exam, but he asked me first if I wanted one. (This was aside from another time when a general physician did one as part of a routine and compulsory physical.)

Yes, you make me laugh upon occasion...

Thanks for the sympathy for the hysterectomy, but right now, my quality of life is so poor that I am glad to be rid of it, and if I ever want a child, I will adopt one. Anyway, I have swarms of nieces and nephews to keep me busy.

Well, if you like the one you go to, then you keep going to her. If not, try someone else. I know it sounds awful, believe me, but there is little to do. As for the gay issue, well of all the doctors you may go to, your Gynecologist is the one who has to know. I have never had a bad reaction, from male or female OBGYNs, to be quite honest. If you get a bad reaction, you take action, and report them. No passive shit like taking it lying down. But I doubt you will...

As for yearly, or at least every two years examinations. Being gay, does not exempt you from the illnesses that can effect women. Cervical Cancer, STDs, menstrual problems, breast problems, uterine problems, bladder problems. That is why. Prevention is much better than a cure, and also, women are prone to specific things caused by our reproductive selves. Hormone imbalances, anemia, and so on. These are things that OBGYN specialise in, and trust me, if your sexual/reproductive organs are not well, you are not well.

I am utterly gay, never paused to even think about men, at any age. But, the women I have slept with, for the most part, have slept with men in some part of their lives. It takes all kinds of women, to make the lesbian nation. (or bisexual or whatever) So, it stands to reason that I could acquire human pampiloma virus from a sexual partner, or herpes, or something like that. Never mind how careful I am, or how attentive I am to my health.

Also, I am not yet 35, close, but not 35, and my uterus is in such bad shape, it has to come out. It is killing me. If I did not go to an OBGYN there would have been no discernable reason as to why precisely my health declined so rapidly. Myoma, which is what I have, (over twenty of) are not sexually transmitted, and they do not occur due to an environmental factor. It is genes and the luck of the draw. Same for endometriosis, ovarian cysts, and other things that occur to the uterus, or ovaries or surrounding areas. Granted if you are under 30, the likelihood of anything like this applying to you is not great, but it does happen. By going every few years, (two at most, every year after you turn 30) a doctor who knows your history, can keep track of your health. That way if a problem emerges, and it might, it can be handled before it gets out of hand. It is NOT normal to have spotty cycles, it is normal for a woman to have a period every 25 to 35 days. You mentioned somewhere up there that your cycle is irregular in some way. That alone is a reason to go... I have now reached an age, where I will need to have ultrasounds of my breasts every couple of years. My tits are too small for mammogram, and breast cancer runs in my family on both sides. It does not mean I will get it, my mother never did, but the fact remains, I possess breasts, and therefore I need to have them checked to insure my health. Mastectomy i better than death, lumpectomy is better than mastectomy, but the worse scenario could happen if I ignore the fact that I need to be screened.

I know it sucks, but if you manage to find a doctor you can tolerate and who does not make you too uncomfortable, then that is a boon for you. I despise going to dentists, but I go. I intensely dislike having anyone's fingers in my mouth except my own when needed and those of any lover I may have, and even then only when there is cause or occasion. But, having a stranger poke in my mouth, is better than having an abscessed tooth, or losing a tooth, or gum disease, or whatever. I go to prevent these things. I go to the eye doctor to get a new prescription, because a day of dialated eyes, every few years, is better than migraines and eye strain every day...

Splenetic

17.7.2007 18:36

I really do hate the idea of having to go through the examination while I'm still wondering whether or not to stick with that particular gynaecologist. Hrrrr... I wonder if it could be possible for me to get to talk with the doctor over the phone before the actual appointment? Then I knew beforehand what I have gotten myself into but and also hear her voice and get to know her a little based on the way she talks to me. And if I found her language utterly appaling I could just cancel. I wouldn't want to take any leap of faiths, not in this matter.

Yes, I did mention in the original entry (a vague memory...) that my periods are irregular. Actually, possibly due to the latest changes in my life, they haven't showed for two months now. So my best-before-date of 35 days was quite a while ago.

And yes, thanks to the extensive amount of literature I've resently read about gyneacology (four books so far, and plenty of web pages), I know very well that lesbianisms doesn't guarantee the absence of sexually transmitted diseases. And since by now most outsiders have probably stopped reading this conversation, let it be noted that when I said in the original entry that I have no sex life I meant exactly that. Shortly, I don't really have to worry about STDs. Alas, again thanks to the books mentioned above, I also know that even though 95 per cent of human papilloma virus infections are transmitted sexually, in the remaining five per cent it has been transmitted in every day skin contact. So, depending on the HPV type, it may or may not turn into a genital disease. Guess how keen on touching strangers I've been after that. The Egyptians were right, knowledge does promote agony.

But despite my ..reluctant.. expectations, I will go to a gynaecologist, from the private sector in order to have a say about the person examining my genitalia. The appointment will be somewhere in mid-August, so stay tuned; a lot of anxious entries coming up!

Thank you for convincing me to go there. Thanks also to the woman who, albeit unknowingly, started this whole contemplation on whether or not to go see a gynaecologist; it is not even remotely plausible that you will ever read this, but thank you anyway. Who knows, maybe both of you did me a big favour, lest they do find something.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

Rain

17.7.2007 23:26

I am sure you can talk to the doctor before seeing her. As for sex, well I tend to have long periods of reluctant abstinence, coupled with short periods of bliss. Seems that I am such a loner that most find me intolerable as a lover in the long run. I go for years without any sex, at a time. Mostly because I am tired of bullshit, and the great 'cunt hunt' has no draw for me...

Also, HPV, does not necessarily mutate into cancer or genital warts, it can... Just as being exposed to someone's cold, does not necessarily mean you will get it. There are many strains of HPV, not all are malignant, or nasty... And I do recommend the private sector when it comes to something intimate like Gynecology. I would not dream of doing that in the public sector, even though I will have my surgery done in a public hospital, my doctor is working privately.

You ever read the books? I never saw the movie, could not bear to see it, but the books I do have. There is just something intensely interesting about them...

Splenetic

18.7.2007 17:06

Yes. I read the first one both in Finnish and two of the sequels in English. The rest of the "trilogy" is still waiting to be read. And I saw the movie, too. Mainly becaue it had Alan Rickman in it, and Adams himself was writing the script as well. The point-of-view gun was something he invented for the movie. The film was okay (the actress playing Trillian is actually the sister of the actress who plays Bones!), but I do prefer the real thing. The books are not restricted by laws of physics or the limits of special FX... or the restrictions coming from the producers and their ideas of what is allowed and what is not. I just read one other novel by Douglas Adams: "The Long, Dark Tea-time of the Soul". Far too weird for me; it just hadn't the same "something intensely interesting" in it.

Splenetic

18.7.2007 17:18

And, by the way, I just got an appointment to a gynaegologist (private). Beware the 14th of August, the entry might not be too joyous. But at least I got a grip of myself. The doctor is in her fifties and she specialises in treating students so in that respect this being my first time at a gynaecologists office will probably not be that unusual to her. I wish she's going to be kind and understanding when it comes to this phobia of mine, and that she's going to do as I ask and keep talking to me all the time prior to, during and after the examination. Let us hope for the best (and fear for the worst, as always)! Better be descreet, gentle and obedient with the sixty-nine euros I get to pay for this merriment... =P

Rain

18.7.2007 22:13

Re: First comment...

Yeah, it took me a while to read all five parts, really they are books of their own, that sort of fit together...

Re: Second comment...

Sounds good, and she sounds nice enough. I am sure you will impart upon us how she actually is after you have met her.